How painful.

How painful for the little child with the dark circles under her eyes, who peeps nervously at passers-by out of the car window.

How painful for the soft-faced man who drags his feet and sags his shoulders when yet another car-horn sounds alarmingly loud in his ear.

How painful for the small-eyed housewife who cringes when the child bawls and the steel plate with all the rice in it tips over and lands clanging, white-showering the floor.

How painful for the old, fat woman with hair grey and black who sits rocking in her chair to the mundane life-sounds from outside and has dreams of people who died this last month.

How painful for the blustery, balding bachelor when he finds himself alone.

How painful for the tired professional who turns the key into the dark, empty flat, and sets the alarm by the light of the microwave.

How painful for the pale, bespectacled boy, when all the rest win and he does not.

The question really, then, is- What happens to the Little Dull Girl who was Good, but not Great enough ?
We've seen the Adventurous Girl go out, have an adventure and then settle down with the nice (old?) man, for a safe- and- sound happily ever after.
Does that mean, then, that the soft, plain girl who likes safety gets the slapdash, unreliable black sheep ? As reward ?
Being good doesn't pay as well as it ought. I've always felt that. Noone says thatnk you for all the times you've been good. And if/ since opposites attract, it seems being good doesn't pay in the long run either.
Sad.
But the Bible says so too- in that bit that I've never quite agreed to. The part that says that there's more joy in heaven over the one sinner who repents than there is over a hundred men who've been good all along.
I mean, it isn't fair.
It's practically telling you to be bad all you're life, just say you're sorry on your deathbed, and it all works out ok.
As I said, unfair. To all those people who believe Being Good, rather than the Reward, is the point of the exercise. They actually deserve the rewards, and consequently, won't get them.
And so, my little girl, with the small imagination and the big mind and feeling, will be stuck with some horrible bastard whom she'll compensate for till Kingdom come, with no remuneration. Again, unfair.
But... that's the way it is, I guess.
Someone goes wrong, and someone makes amends.
someone cries and someone laughs.
Someone gives up his illusion so that others can keep theirs.
Some live so that others may dream.
Some dream so that others may live better.

It's always God's-light. But if it isn't cloudy, you don't notice.