a little cockroach is lying on its back near the wall beneath the switchboard. It's not even a proper cockroach yet- it's still a whadyoucallit. It's little.

It moves one foreleg in a slow convulsion. Its long slender antennae stretch out on either side, far longer than its body- in a human, that would be long hair streaming out behind her....

It squiggles all its legs this time. Tries squirming, to get right-way-up again. But when a roach is flat on its back, it really is flat on its back.

I switch off the annoyingly bright light that's shining into it's face, and switch on a quieter one somewhere else in the room.

I don't know whether I wish it well or ill.

'Callouses- Or is it Calluses?- on my feet again. And now they're beginning to blossom all over my brain too. Sleep- I'll douse it for a bit, and smile a lot in the morning, and do things. And talk to people. Perhaps I should read some old kiddy books. And make plans to watch a movie tomorrow. Or two. And I really must get down to work. There's so much of it piled up. And Christmas presents for everyone. And I'll get some of that peppy, filmi music- it's a bit more cheerful. Liven things up. And... and- oh, there's so much to do anyway. I'll never get all of it done. I'd better not take any more things on my head. Not one moment to rest. Of course. I'm not complaining, but noone does these things if I'm not around. Half- a- dozen bulbs were fused in the house, and the blankets were filthy, and there was a mouse practising jumps into the waste-basket in the guest bedroom. I had to go out myself to get the bulbs, and get everything done, and I'm so tired now...

No, that isn't why I'm tired.
I'm sorry. I forgot it was you.'

A little girl sat on my lap the other day.
Pale and light with a Miss Universe smile and a thin, squeaky voice.
And unlike those pale little girls in poetry and fairy stories, she talked.
She talked a lot, and quite loudly.
Told me how she'd got 18 out of 24 stars that term, the highest in her class.
About how she took care of her baby brother the whole afternoon while everyone was out.
About how she'd got three books out of the Sunday School cupboard because they had been lying there for a long time.
Then she offered me- first the yellow one, then the brown one, and then the green one.
And when I told her it was alright, she should keep them, she said- No, you take.
And then, with great concentration, with her toes tucked around my ankle, she wrote in the yellow one and gave it to me.
I took it.

Presented to... Rhea didi
By... Moneta Minoy
Date... 23.11.2008